Growing up, I had always had lots of friends. Most of these friends were people that I met in school or was introduced to by others. When you are young, you just assume you will grow up, start a job, get married, and keep those friendships, but as is often the case we become consumed by work and family life, and we lose touch with many of those people. Friendship takes work.
Friendships to me are like plants; each one is entirely individual and unique in personality and like plants they need to be fed and cared for or they will wilt and eventually the friendship will die. We all have those individuals who have wandered in and out of our lives; at one time we were close, but as time passed, they drifted away and we lost touch.
Youth take so much for granted. They don’t seem to maintain friendships. I can’t count the number of times that younger people have asked how long my friends and I have known each other. They are shocked to learn that many of us have been close friends for 50+ years. This fact amazes them. Most have not even been alive near that long. My daughter, who is now 40, often remarks how she has not stayed friends with any of the kids from school. She has developed new friendships through her work, but they do not share a history.
There is something to be said about growing older together. We know the good, the bad, and the ugly about each other.We have been there through marriages, babies, divorces, health problems, and yes, even death. We do not always agree, and that’s just fine.
My own amazing circle of girlfriends are an unusual mix of characters. We come in all shapes and sizes and preferences, but we share a common trait. We love to laugh…at life, at each other, and yes, even at ourselves. About 7 years ago several of us started to get together for dinner every few weeks. Well, for the last 5 years we have met for dinner EVERY Wednesday at the Tartan Tavern (yes, it is old like we are) no matter the weather and even when the power was out. Sometimes there are 9 or 10 of us squeezed around our table and sometimes only 3, but we never miss. We have become somewhat of a fixture at this pub and the waitresses and other regulars know to expect our rowdy gang without fail. We chat and gossip and laugh so much that my sides often ache when I leave. On occasion, we break into random song and that creates quite a stir.
My family mean the world to me, but I am not sure I could have made it this far in my life without my girlfriends. They lift my spirit and support my goals. They have never let me down when I needed them.
Girlfriends are powerful.
Thanks for reading,
One thought on “Girlfriends”
I enjoy your blog, Penny. It speaks to my heart. I share your thoughts on friendships and women. My mother was my role model. As a very young girl …probably pre kindergarten and kindergarten when I would have been home in the mornings, I was privy to Mother’s coffee sessions with Mrs. Gibson from next door. I was allowed to be with them as long as I was quiet and to aid in this activity she let me have cold leftover toast from breakfast.
Mrs. Gibson’s family was rife with great drama! I couldn’t get enough! Then over the years many many of my mother’s friends came into my life and I learned to appreciate the special role her lady friends played in her life. I might add too, that you and I never had a sister. I wonder if that might have made a difference.
I too have women who go back as far as kindergarten including you. And today I celebrate the amazing women I have become close to from then until last week! Yes! I made a new friend and we went to see Lady Bird. A film about mother’s and daughters and relationships. You know, many of our old school mates have taken on a similar path as we have in cherishing old acquaintances.
On so many levels old friends are the ones I value and trust the most. Yes, because they know the good the bad and the ugly.
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